March 12, 2010

Started Weight Watchers online over 3 weeks ago...I have lost about 3 lbs. I am sooooo pissed . I don't cheat. I have been doing exercise with the program which I have never done before. I don't know if my body is rebelling or if it is my age or if it is because I had WLS. I am so depressed. I was doing better just working out and not dieting. I could eat what I wanted and have a huge crap in the morning. It was definitely not stressful. I really don't know what I am going to do at this point. I am still following the WW diet...it has become a challenge at this point.

213.6

Weight Watchers

I joined WW online 16 days ago. I really like it so far. My weight loss has not been fast at all. The first week I gained 1/2 lb! I was angry because I have not cheated at all and I am exercising. I have done WW before via meetings but I have NEVER exercised. I started out at 216.6. I try to w/o 3 times a week and bowl one day a week. I want to lose weight but it is hard because I am eating healthy but now I don't go to the bathroom every morning like I normally did from all the junk I was eating. Mike has been very helpful by taking the diet pop out of the house. He keeps it in the garage. It has slowed his intake down also. I drink lots of water. I do have diet pop when I am out from time to time. I have been ordering water in resturants too. That is a big step for me. All of this has been big steps for me. I never even thought about doing WW online. I just got up one morning and did it! Wow pretty incredible for me. I wonder what will happen in the next month. I am going to try to lose 5 lbs at a time. I want to lose 65 lbs..we will see. I am proud of myself.

Still trying

I am still going to the gym. I can't believe it. I haven't been perfect but I have been pretty good. Jennifer lost her job last week, it was very hard on all of us. But for the first time in my life I didn't feed her. I called her and had her spend the night with me. I told her if she would come over we would get up and workout together in the morning. WHAT??? I have never offered to workout with my daughter. NEVER!! To exercise through stress and not eat????? It was wonderful! We did our workout routine and then went down to the pool and walked and walked in the lazy river. We talked and laughed and felt great. I still can't believe it. Of course, par for the course I locked my key inside my locker with my purse!!! We both learned how to use bolt cutters that day! And we laughed about it!!

I have been trying to eat less and drink more water. I even took a bottle of water to the movies with me! I have never ever done that. I grab a bottle of water as I go out the door now instead of a can of pop. I am not perfect but I am better, I am trying.

Thanksgiving was yesterday. We stayed home all day. I did not overeat. I had and egg sandwich and a grilled cheese that day. No whining, no feeling sorry for myself. It was just another day and I chose to stay home and be alone. It was nice.

I realize that this will be the only way things will work for me. I am just trying to do better not diet. Yeah for me!!

OK I went to the gym, bitching the whole way. I didn't want to go but I am going anyway! I got out of the car and tripped on the sidewalk curb!! I fell down and landed on my left knee, both hands, and hurt my left shoulder. I couldn't believe I actually fell. I thought I was going to catch myself but I didn't. I sat there for along time, I couldn't get up. No one saw me. I finally inched my way over to the grill of the car and pulled myself up. I hobbled to the car and drove myself home. I hurt too bad to exercise. I came home took a shower and 2 Aleve. This bites!! I will go back. My left wrist is killing me and my hand throbs!! Grrrr it is just wrong to hurt yourself trying to get healthy!

starting again

I missed going to the gym while I was in Decatur. I did not use the treadmill in the hotel. I just couldn't do it. I was tired most of the time and just wanted to relax.

I came back on Friday and worked out on Sat. I was already out of shape. I wasn't able to do the bike afterward. I was glad I went though. I am going back today.

My eating is still not what I want it to be.

Weight 216

I started feeling better on Monday. I went to the gym early and did my workout. I only rode the bike for one mile again. My chest was hurting and I was beat red. I felt like I was pushing myself too hard. I was very proud of myself. I also checked into the hotel we are staying at in Decatur. It has a workout room and I was glad! WTF?? Me checking to see if they had a workout room??

Today is Thursday. I started feeling kinda crummy on Tuesday but I still bowled. I sweated like crazy.

By Weds I was sick again. I did not work out. I did not care.

I feel much worse today. My chest is hurting and it is scaring me. I need to go to the doctor. I talked with Jana tonight. She convinced me to cancel my party. I hated to do that but I really feel bad.

I just want to get better right now.

I woke up and I was still sick. This ridiculous! I am not going to get better sitting on the couch. I decided to go do my workout anyway. I was afraid to let anymore time go by w/o doing it. I went and did my whole workout plus 1 mile on the bike. I sweated like a pig. I wanted to sweat this crap out of my body. I WENT AND WORKED OUT WHEN I WAS SICK!! This is a good thing.

Today is Sunday and I am still sick but I am proud of myself.

I weighed 215 on Saturday.